|
  |
|
|
It isn't the thought that counts unless
By Lynda Kohn of Chestnut Place
There is the well known saying "When it comes to gifts its the thought that counts." Its not the thought that counts unless its thinking of what would please the other person. Well in my humble opinion one should give much deliberation before giving somebody a present. To not do so is to me, showing not much thought was taken. Basically in my opinion the thought is giving some thought to what the person would like. Being thoughtful isn't enough. One should take into account what the receiving person wants and likes. To do so otherwise shows that not much thought was given into the choice of what was given. It can show the person doing the giver never showed any consideration of what the receiver would like, or want or in some cases need. I say its the thought that counts if the one giving the gift considered what the person being given, wanted as a gift. Of course for most people economic factors come into play. It would be most unfair, inconsiderate to expect an expensive item from somebody who couldn't pay for it. I would change the expression to its the thought that counts to mean its the thought of thinking how the other individual feels about what is being given. Gifts are by definition in most dictionaries voluntary giving of either material goods and/or money. By gift I don't mean cashgifting. Cashgifting is illegal in most nations. A gift should be volutarily given. Nobody should ever feel that giving a gift is an obligation. If somebody gives someone else a gift the receiver shouldn't ever feel they are obligated to reciprocate. Reciprocating is a good thing. However to feel one must reciprocate is unfair. People need to be feeling they want to give back because they want to, not because they are feeling they need to.
A synonym for gift is present. Some people say life is a gift. One should live in the moment in the present since life is a present. In my humble opinion ideally one should learn from the past, prepare for the future and enjoy the present.
There are virtually as many gifts or presents as there are individuals. One person may like one item and the same thing can be detested by somebody else. Ideally one should give something that will be liked and even better appreciated. If one doesn't know the person that well, something that doesn't cost that much and is a general favorite is the best bet. Its a very likely notion that if one keeps to something that most everybody likes it will be received in a genuinely positive manner. Still one needs to be somewhat careful. For example while most people in the United States of America are Christian, there are other religions represented. A woman or man who practices Christianity may very well like to be given a Bible with the Old and New Testaments. On the other hand a Jew would not. The exception would be if she or he is a Messianic Jew. These are Jews who believe Jesus is, or as they refer to Him, as Yeshua is the Jewish Messiah as they interpret the Old Testament, otherwise known as the Holy Scriptures. For that matter Old Testament is a Christian term It implies it is old and a New Testament is needed. Followers of Judaism are of the belief that what Christians call the "Old Testament" is complete and therefore should be called the Holy Scriptures. Conversely Evangelical and other Christians of similar beliefs are much convinced giving Bibles that include both testaments is being very giving. It is some people who follows Christ sincere conviction to convert everyone, especially Jews to follow Jesus. To their perspective they are doing Jewish people a favor by giving them OT and NT Bibles. Most non Jew, Non Christian would most definitely not be grateful being given a Bible period. One should be sensitive to the culture, needs of the recipient. On a somewhat lighter note, the likes, dislikes, interests should be considered. The capabilities of the receiver must be remembered too. Some of these things are what most would call common sense. When giving to people with disailities, the disability should be given into account. One example would be giving video games to someone subject to Gran Mal Epilepsy. It may be possible the flashing lights, the constant rapid action may produce a Gran Mal Seizure. Likewise showing a web site without an audible reader would be a total waste of time to the blind. Sending a video sans sign language interpretation would be terrible to give to the deaf. One must be considering the whole person. Religion, politics, disability, ethnicity, general likes and dislikes need to be evaluated. Much of gift giving is simply being considerate of the values, opinions, likes, dislikes, culture of the other person. A good deal of it is what's commonly known as common sense. It is very basically being sensitive to the other's feelings, sentiments, perspectives. It could be something as simple as individual tastes. Its listening to the other person and really hearing what they are saying in terms of tastes. Politics can be part of the decision on what to give too. For example it would be a poor choice to give a book in praise of Glenn Beck, Bill O'Reilly Michelle Malkin others, book to a liberal. Conversely it wouldn't be a good idea to give writings by Arianna Huffington, Eric Alterman, Keith Oilberman to a Conservative. Of course within financial means, to give the most thoughtful gift, think about what the indidivuals tastes. On a personal note, one of my favorite gifts in my life was the day on my birthday my sister gave me art equipment. It was on that canvas she bought me I painted a painting of a little girl with a little Bichon type canine. That artwork won me the best in show in a disabled artist artshow in Norristown PA in 2004.
I am a disability advocate in Phila, PA. My blog entree on the Medicaid Safety act was listed in 2008 number one in the Google blog directory under that topic. Plus I've shown my artwork in various galleries in Phila, local suburbs and NYC. I've been doing disability advocacy since the late 70s in Philadelphia, PA and suburbs. My mental health stigma Squidoo site can be seen at http://disabilityinfo.hostcell.net/MHStigma.htm My disability site is at http://disabilityinfo.hostcell.net/index.htm Blog http://societyfordaintydamsels.wordpress.com Two self proclaimed etiquette experts, dear friends,Auntie carol and Lady Lynda. Lady Lynda's gentleman friend is Seymour Toze who loves Lady Lynda in her open toed spiked heels. With exotic, sensual Black Orchid and earthy Wanda Lust. I work as a disability advocate for Chestnut Place Rehab. This Sept. 2011 we plan to be celebrating our 20th year.
|
|
 |
|
No reactions yet.
Please login or sign up to rate this intel.
Please login or sign up to add a comment.
The copyright for this content entitled "It isn't the thought that counts unless" has been specified by the contributor as:
Creative Commons Attribution-Share Alike 3.0
Details 
This content may be copied, distributed, and modified, as long as a) the original author is acknowledged with a link back to the content page, and b) if the work is modified, the result is distributed with this same license.
If you use this content according to the license specified, you must link to the following URL:
http://mugwort.qondio.com/
|
|
|
This intel was contributed by mugwort
|
May, 2012
2008
January, February, March, April, May, June, July, August, September, October, November, December
2009
January, February, March, April, May, June, July, August, September, October, November, December
2010
January, February, March, April, May, June, July, August, September, October, November, December
2011
January, February, March, April, May, June, July, August, September, October, November, December
2012
January, February, March, April, May
|
|
Not a member yet?
Qondio is a powerful network for making it online. If you have a website to
promote, we can help.
Sign up and get in on the action.
|
|
Welcome to Qondio! Discover the awesome power this network can deliver by going to our About page. Or you could skip straight to the Sign Up form.
|
|
